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    theresa


    Theresa Lode or, simply “T”, had her world turned upside down and inside out when her son was diagnosed with ADHD and a few other goodies. Her choice- follow the doctor's orders....or trust her heart and delve into the world of Free Range Education. She chose the latter...

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Are parents the village idiots?

The following is a letter to the editor I submitted to the Independent Record today.   My guess is they won’t run it.  What a glorious day we live in that the former gatekeepers in the media are no longer the only game in town.  So I publish it here. 

Parents, we’ve been sold downriver.  And the betrayal will continue if our current school board and Bruce Messinger are left unchallenged in the upcoming school board election.

Jobs, poverty and public welfare are all tied to our schools.  And our schools are failing.  Times have changed and their insistence at maintaining the broken status quo is to the detriment of our kids.

The icing on this nasty cake is the school administration’s ongoing refusal to work with parents beyond addressing us with placating doublespeak as though we’re the village idiots.

We are at a crossroads in history and I believe education reform is the civil rights movement of this century.  It is clear from this session that as a state, Montana is not open to reform.  (Thanks to the deep pockets of lobbyists.)

The outrageous campaign efforts on behalf of Planned Parenthood for the incumbents further indicate where their interests lay. (And their manipulative radio ads using the voices of the children chill my blood.)  Never mind declining academic performance; we’ve a lot of social engineering to do!

Reform must begin on a local level and I can’t think of a more urgent need anywhere than here in Helena.

Theresa Lode

A school of failure

There’s a lot of talk about “failing schools” according to the criteria in No Child Left Behind. And of course, there’s a lot of subjective measurement that’s a bit trickier to quantify what makes a school great.

I propose something a bit different.  A School of Failure. It would look something like this:

Daydreaming would be encouraged.

“Why not?” would be heard as often as “Why?”Taking initiative would be encouraged.  Failure is welcomed.  And wildly cheered.

Standardized tests and grades are thought to be irrelevant.

Teachers would shine as mentors and coaches, not cogs.

Yep, by today’s measurements, this would be a school of failure.

I’d enroll my kids in a minute.

Please call on the Charter School bill

Here’s the link to the article from the IR on the charter school hearing last week.  I find the comments following the article interesting; it is clear there is a lot of fear.  Indeed, anytime the “C” (change)  word is introduced,  we humans retreat. Even an inmate will chose the security and familiarity of his cell over freedom.

It was interesting listening to the arguments against the charters at the hearing.  (And a bit amusing at time; like when an educator of 30+ years used the word “irregardless” but I digress.)  ;)

One thing that I found truly disturbing was Eric Feaver’s umbrage at the use of “out of state” help in writing this bill.  Feaver is the head of the Montana Education Association. Really?  Really? Is there a name for interstate xenophobia?

Doesn’t it make sense to consult with an expert who has achieved a level of success in a field, regardless of their state of residency?

I’ve spent too much time out of state to be impressed with the “We’re Montanans we don’t need no help” rationale.  I find the juxtaposition of ignorance and arrogance in such a statement, fascinating.

Yeah, there’s bad charters out there.  (I betcha there’s FAR more bad public schools.)  And is a charter a silver bullet solution?  Absolutely not.

Change has got to begin somewhere though.   The schools have violated our trust. Our test scores are  in the toilet.  Challenge a 12th grader to read a 6th grade McGuffy’s reader.   And critical thinking skills? Laughable.   (Consider- Exhibit A: The “We’re Montanans” argument.)

And don’t show me statistics; the most important lesson when it comes to statistics, IMHO, is that people can twist them to represent whatever they want. Need validation?  Just talk to a teacher.  The one I visited with the other day said she retired early after 30 years in the classroom.  “I loved it but just couldn’t take it anymore,” she told me.   I’ve heard countless stories that echo what she told me.

The Powers That Be have paid lip service to change and have delivered more of the same.  (Perhaps they were too busy discussing how the explicit sex ed curriculum is in the best interests of our children.)

If you haven’t contacted the members of the education committee yet, you may do so here.

We need education reform.  NOW. Our kids deserve so much better.

 

Did The System help kill my brother?

It’s been about a year and half since my brother, Dan, died.  Despite valiant efforts, we watched helplessly over a two day period as his life went from “business as usual” to a difficult decision to remove life support.  He died here in Helena, before we moved back and I find myself driving through town trying to picture my older brother walking down the street.  It still chokes me up to drive by his apartment.  He was 46 and too young to die.

But yet we weren’t surprised.  Dan’s life was a hard one: chemical addictions and long periods of homelessness. By the time they realized he was in acute liver failure, it was too late.  I still mourn his passing and I also mourn a life of what could have been.

My sisters and I have talked more than once about the “What if’s” and the contributing factors to Dan’s rough road in life.  (Yes, we understand that a person has the power of choice and are not pointing the finger at anyone.)

Dan was diagnosed at a young age as “hyperkinetic” (that’s ADHD in the modern parlance) and dyslexic.  Dan was whisked off to a facility with the mentally and emotionally ill where he was put on Ritalin and I’m sure…stigmatized.

By the time we moved across the state years later, we were all enrolled in the public school.  Having been in a private Catholic school, it was quite a shock for all of us.  It was a mean culture and a rough transition as we were the “outsiders” in this small town.

It was an especially cruel time for Dan though.  The ridicule and the depth of his academic struggles were staggering.  After 6th grade, I don’t even think he attended school at all.  He began experimenting with drugs about then.  Mom suspected he was self medicating his ADHD since he was no longer on Ritalin.  And looking back now….it was the beginning of the end.

Sure there were some other factors in Dan’s “issues.”  But I look back and see a catastrophic failure of The System as playing a role in his demise.  The One-Size-Fits-A-Few educational models that categorized Dan and his differences as deficient played a role.  He was weighed in the balance and found wanting.  That’s a shit-load of a trip for a 12-year-old.

Despite his labels, Dan was brilliant boy.  He would wire anything, work on a car and had an ear for music.  He was a whiz at electronics.  He was hyper and happy.  Boy, was he hyper!

I wonder if Dan’s life would have played out differently if he was told he was a smart boy. And given the opportunity to cultivate his strengths.  Less time remediating stuff he would never be good at (though I noticed his handwriting DID improve with age,) and more time learning a trade that would have given him a livelihood.

I am deeply, deeply concerned over the rising rates of ADHD diagnoses and the corresponding amount of kids on medication.  I am troubled by the “Dan’s” that are right now annoying their teachers in the classroom and receiving the message that they’re defective.

Charter schools are far from a perfect fix but it can be the needed first bite into the elephant, as it were.  What if there was a school that could accommodate the kids with learning differences?

Yes, I see that hand in the back of the class.  The local school’s supposed to do that.  Uh-huh.  Let’s talk about that with the teacher who’s got 26 kids, four of whom need uber extra help, in her class and is under the gun to make sure her class scores on the latest standardized tests are up to par.  (God help our poor teachers, heroes they are.)

But charters aren’t just a good idea for kids with special needs or learning differences.  There are also charter schools for kids with technical bents and schools that emphasize the arts.

The powers that be in Montana think the key is to increase the compulsory age to 18 to keep kids from dropping out.  I think we need to make school more relevant for these kids and the drop-out rates will take care of itself.  And I believe charter schools can help with the need for relevance.

It is incumbent upon parents and educators to realize that it’s time…way past time…to address our education crisis. There are too many Dan’s out there. But there are also dancers and dreamers who are disengaged…and the world needs their gifts too.

If you’ve stuck with me this far in this way lengthy epistle, I thank you.  And if you agree that it’s time to bring more options to the table for parents and their kids, please come show your support on Wednesday at 3PM for HB 603.

Are we brainwashing our children?

brainwash  (ˈbreɪnˌwɒʃ) — vb( tr ) to effect a radical change in the ideas and beliefs of (a person),

Is this not what is happening in our schools on a daily basis?  Moral neutrality, Outcome based education, Standardized testing, these are just a few of the tools being used daily to brainwash, er, effect a radical change in the ideas and beliefs of our children.

Consider a quote that hearkens back to 1902 from the newly formed General Education:

“In our dreams, we have limitless resources and the people yield themselves with perfect docility to our molding hands…The task we set before ourselves is very simple as well as very beautiful one, to train these people as we find them to a perfectly ideal life just where they are.” Fredrick Taylor Gates (This was the dude behind Rockefeller’s philanthropic efforts.  It was he who dictated how much and where Rockefeller’s endowments would land.)

I was reminded yet again at how education is not about critical thinking, exploration or curiosity…it’s about The Test.

This week, Caleb is taking the standardized tests as required by the No Child Left Behind nonsense.  Yesterday, I received the school newsletter complete with tips on how to help my child succeed on the test.  You may remember some of the testing tips, “read all the choices in multiple choice and eliminate the ones you’re certain of first.”

Tomorrow night, I am attending a lecture on “general predictors of educational success and how communities can take action to improve the performance of students.”  That should be very enlightening.  I doubt they’re going to talk about learning about a child’s strengths and how to develop them best as an individual.

The Test is no longer about the child either. The school is weighed in the balance. (And their funding depends upon their performance.)  The teachers are graded (can you imagine the challenge if you have classroom of unmotivated kids?)  And now…the parents are being called upon…not to cultivate their kid’s interests or help them study great literature or develop creativity…but to help them take The Test.  The insanity of it all!

But I guess one might say that now, it really does take a village…to brainwash a child.

PS I’m eager to watch “Waiting for Superman.”  In should be in the mailbox today.

 

Finding the right tool

Would use a hoe to perfatape a wall? Or an awl to dig a hole?

As I write this, I am listening to a flooring guy scrape the subfloor of our kitchen in preparation to lay new vinyl.  We tried to get as much done as we could in advance to keep our costs down but I’m left to wonder if we really did save money.

The time, the frustration and the apparent futility of our work…even with a rented tool was not nearly as fruitful as what I’m hearing this guy accomplish…because he has the right tools.

As we get older, we realize with increasing frequency, that it pays to have someone else service our vehicles, install flooring or attend to household repairs.  Not because we’re incapable…Jay is quite handy as is Daniel.  Heck, I’m fairly capable in some areas too.

But when we set out to do something, the learning curve is a lot higher and it may take us hours to do what an expert can accomplish in one.  And then there’s that tool thing too.  (We finally figured that by the time we rented this one gizmo to install the underlayment on the kitchen floor, it really WAS cheaper to hire someone.)

Which brings me to kids and how we educate them.  School is the most widely used and recognized tool when it comes to education.  This is the tool that will open doors to bright and successful future, we are told.

But for many kids…it is the wrong tool.  And we wonder why kids are unmotivated and disillusioned with school.  We wonder why they’re dropping out. And we lament over sky rocketing rates of ADD/ADHD and historic numbers of kids on chemical leashes.

Do you remember the last time you worked at a job with the wrong tool?  (Don’t tell anyone but the language around here can get a bit salty when we don’t have the right tool.)

It’s time to rethink this school thing from a different angle.

Insisting that all children work with the “school tool” is both arrogant and ignorant.  To proclaim some children” learning disabled” and allow them to become stigmatized because they need a different set of tools is bodacious.

Every child has brilliance in them.  Every child is uniquely gifted.  The key is finding the right tool(s) to unlock and unleash their gifts to the world.  For some children, this may mean mentoring with a small business owner.  Or apprenticing with a craftsman.  Learning from an artist.

When you rethink the concept of school and education and realize how limiting a one tool approach is, endless and glorious possibilities appear.

Perhaps SCHOOL is the problem

Our schools are not working.  The drop out rate in Montana alone is 16%. (Here in Helena it’s around 20%)  For American Indians, only 63% will graduate.

Some say we need to throw more money at the problem.  (As it IS a real problem; we are talking about young people with no sense of who they are, no marketable skills or a diploma.  (I could debate the true value of a diploma but the bottom line is that most employers want to see one.)

One mom, desperate to see her son’s low GPA increased, resorted to having him hang out on a street corner announcing his apparent failure to the world.  (That poor kid.  Read about it here.)

I think the problem is more fundamental than a money or humiliation fix can address.  Maybe…just maybe…SCHOOL is the problem.

People far smarter than I have given this great thought.  Consider this jewel by Ivan Illich:

Many students, especially those who are poor, intuitively know what the schools do for them. They school them to confuse process and substance. Once these become blurred, a new logic is assumed: the more treatment there is, the better are the results; or, escalation leads to success. The pupil is thereby “schooled” to confuse teaching with learning, grade advancement with education, a diploma with competence, and fluency with the ability to say something new. His imagination is “schooled” to accept service in place of value. Medical treatment is mistaken for health care, social work for the improvement of community life, police protection for safety, military poise for national security, the rat race for productive work. Health, learning, dignity, independence, and creative endeavour are defined as little more than the performance of the institutions which claim to serve these ends, and their improvement is made to depend on allocating more resources to the management of hospitals, schools, and other agencies in question. Ivan Illich Deschooling Society (1973: 9)

Managing ADD/ADHD in the home

“You run our family like a business,” my son told me yesterday.  He gestured to the large white board we have mounted on the wall.

It was a compliment to me but I know he wasn’t saying it with appreciation.

But it’s part of effort to keep disorganization and Shiny Object Syndrome (SOS) at bay in our home.   So  here’s just a few things I’ve found to help manage ADD in our home.

Use a white board. I use it to write down goals and their rewards.  Hubby Jay and I also use it to brainstorm ideas and family topics we need to address.  There’s something about having these things writ large in bright blue marker that turns all those bunny trails turn into a map.

Pick your battles. I could give a flying fig if my ADHD’er has nice handwriting.  Unless your child has a future as a call to handwrite sacred documents like a Middle Ages Monk, I see little reason to get all worked up over this.  Ditto for keeping his room clean.  I shut his door and pray for his future wife.  I have other issues that are more important for me on which to spend my energy.

Accept their limitations. I want to scream and pull my hair out every time I hear a mom lament their child’s lagging progress in any give area.  Are YOU a good bookkeeper?  Can YOU sing well?   Do YOU know how to fix a car?  I’m sure you answered “no” to at least one of those things.  And I bet you don’t lie awake thinking about how “behind” you are.

Instead of insisting your kid has beautiful handwriting or shoes lined up neatly under his bed…why not focus on developing his wild creativity? (BTW- Creativity is spelled: M-E-S-S.) Or help him put legs on an idea to turn it into a business.  (Entrepreneurship is a FABULOUS option for ADHD’ers.)

Show them options. My boy has the drive and brains of an entrepreneur.  But good business management is not one of his strengths.  I tell him, without condemnation, that he will need to have someone who IS good at business management help that side of his business.

Laugh. You will several years down the road looking back at these crazy days…why not do it now?

Q4U:  How do you manage ADD/ADHD in your home?

3 Ways to motivate your unmotivated kid

“He just doesn’t want to do anything.” “Getting my kid to do anything beside computer games is like pulling teeth.” I deal with this sort of stuff PLENTY in my home.  Here are three approaches to consider when handling an unmotivated kid:

Tiger Mom approach. You’ve certainly heard about her by now.  This method commands absolute obedience…nothing less! Tools for this approach include: yelling, threats and a little ridicule thrown in if that Mother’s Day card doesn’t measure up.

Shortcomings with this approach?  You’ve got well trained monkeys but you’ve lost their heart.  Mom becomes a drill sergeant instead of a mom. And Mom, if she doesn’t already have control-freak tendencies, will certainly foster this trait in a strong way.  (Bonus points if mom develops an anxiety disorder.)

Competition. Homeschool mom’s are especially good at this one.  Be sure and remind your kids of how other kids are faring.  Dangle rewards for achievements.  Shame comes in handy for this one if the kid doesn’t measure up.

This one may produce short term effects but what happens when they still have no internal motivation.? You take away the reward…they lose their motivation.

True, life DOES offer rewards and sometimes accomplishment is its own reward.  But remember…Kids are kids and they don’t have the perspective you and I have as adults. On the other hand, when was the last time YOU were rewarded for cleaning house and preparing a meal?  Yeah…more often than not, life isn’t waiting to offer you a gold star.

Is there a better way?

Here’s my favorite one:

An invitation. I like to think of this as simply getting out of the way.  Give your child a platform.  Give them an opportunity to rise to the top.  Instead of trying to manipulate their behavior…cast a vision before them.

For example, Molly’s piano practice has slacked off considerably.  A Tiger Mom I am not…I got other hills on which to die.  But she heard of a Teen Open Mic night at a local business.  And 3 hour practice sessions were soon happening.  (And she performed beautifully.)

Okay, I hear all that opposition yelling.  No, I haven’t been smoking dope (even though it IS legal here in Montana.)

Your kid is not going to wake up overnight with a new vision for self government.  ESPECIALLY if they’re used to being told what to do all the time in school.  Go ahead…do something radical…give them TIME.  Time to sort out what makes them come alive.  Time to develop some creative ideas and concoct a wild plan to bike across the state.  Time to dream! (Pssst- It’s helpful to have an “electronics-free” week once in a while.)

I love this approach because it embraces one of my favorite education quotes: Education is not the filling of a bucket but the lighting of a fire. Keats

Q: What approaches have you tried in your home?

A day in the the school of the future

I often say we don’t need educational reform…we need the whole shebang razed.   But how do we equip our kids educationally for the times we live in?  I believe this guy has some very important answers.  I love what he’s doing!  And did I mention this is F-R-E-E?

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